Showing posts with label General Badassery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label General Badassery. Show all posts
Monday, October 31, 2011
Fokker? I 'ardly KNOW her!
If you've ever wanted to pretend that your motorcycle is actually a transforming fighter jet (DON'T YOU LIE TO ME), this helmet is for you:
Make-believe that you're a kid's first experience with traumatic main character death and buy this helmet at HLJ today!
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Call of Duty: Raging Boners
I can practically hear war nerds poppin' em across the free world with the release of this trailer for Act of Valor:
Apparently, real Navy SEALS play the characters in this, and it all looks incredibly authentic. I predict that the shot of a SEAL in the water catching a guy to prevent his falling from making a sound will become an iconic image in the annals of cinematic war.
Apparently, real Navy SEALS play the characters in this, and it all looks incredibly authentic. I predict that the shot of a SEAL in the water catching a guy to prevent his falling from making a sound will become an iconic image in the annals of cinematic war.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
This Movie's Underrated: "Outland"
Every once in a while, I have to look at America's movie-going public and shake my head, muttering, "This is why we can't have nice movies." It happens when I see them overwhelmingly supporting a movie that may well have been picked out of Satan's buttcrack (lookin' at you, Smurfs). But it also happens when an amazing, inventive, cool, or just plain unique movie comes along and it fades into obscurity because nobody sees or supports it.
Outland, directed by Peter Hyams, is one of those movies. It was released right around when Star Wars, Alien, and Blade Runner were ushering in a more naturalistic, gritty, grimy, used-future take on science fiction. Aesthetically, it's got the griminess and claustrophobia of Alien. But thematically is where Outland really builds on Blade Runner and Alien.
Outland, directed by Peter Hyams, is one of those movies. It was released right around when Star Wars, Alien, and Blade Runner were ushering in a more naturalistic, gritty, grimy, used-future take on science fiction. Aesthetically, it's got the griminess and claustrophobia of Alien. But thematically is where Outland really builds on Blade Runner and Alien.
Space Day!
That's right, folks. Today, the blog's gonna be all about space travel, and those who do it.
There's a couple reasons why I love space travel, both in real life and as depicted in science-fiction. I suppose the first reason is that it's just so damned COOL. Space travel is basically about telling gravity not only to go fuck itself, but to work for us while it's at it. How do we do that? By strapping as many fucking rockets as we can to the biggest fuel tanks in the world and putting a tin can full of guys at the top. The lightest fucking can you can build, because otherwise, your guys will crash back down with enough speed and force to give planet earth a hickey.
Space is just so awesome...it's the one environment with which humans absolutely, positively were not built to interact. But that's what I love about humanity: did we take the hint? Fuck no. We narrowed our eyes and nodded slightly: "Game on, universe..."
And that's why I love this article, too. On the one hand, it's been depressing watching the dreams of a generation die as the sinking economy, domestic crises, and science haters in Congress have worked to scuttle our government's space program.
On the other hand, it brings me unending joy to see private companies stepping up to the plate and picking up the slack. Not only is it the one place where I can see the sort of adventurous corporate pioneering spirit that is sorely lacking these days, but it's just so damn cool, like something out of a sci-fi novel. I'm reminded of the quote allegedly from Thomas Watson, former chairman of IBM in 1943: "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
And when the Space Race started, no one could have imagined that scarcely 50 years later, private companies were working to send humanity there en masse, and to reach even beyond our orbit. We're heading into a new era where we don't need governments to do the big things anymore. Where we can strike out on our own power and spirit, setting the rules as we go for better or for worse.
Either way it turns out...whether it'll end up like Star Trek or more like Alien, it's a terribly exciting contemplation.
There's a couple reasons why I love space travel, both in real life and as depicted in science-fiction. I suppose the first reason is that it's just so damned COOL. Space travel is basically about telling gravity not only to go fuck itself, but to work for us while it's at it. How do we do that? By strapping as many fucking rockets as we can to the biggest fuel tanks in the world and putting a tin can full of guys at the top. The lightest fucking can you can build, because otherwise, your guys will crash back down with enough speed and force to give planet earth a hickey.
Space is just so awesome...it's the one environment with which humans absolutely, positively were not built to interact. But that's what I love about humanity: did we take the hint? Fuck no. We narrowed our eyes and nodded slightly: "Game on, universe..."
And that's why I love this article, too. On the one hand, it's been depressing watching the dreams of a generation die as the sinking economy, domestic crises, and science haters in Congress have worked to scuttle our government's space program.
On the other hand, it brings me unending joy to see private companies stepping up to the plate and picking up the slack. Not only is it the one place where I can see the sort of adventurous corporate pioneering spirit that is sorely lacking these days, but it's just so damn cool, like something out of a sci-fi novel. I'm reminded of the quote allegedly from Thomas Watson, former chairman of IBM in 1943: "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
And when the Space Race started, no one could have imagined that scarcely 50 years later, private companies were working to send humanity there en masse, and to reach even beyond our orbit. We're heading into a new era where we don't need governments to do the big things anymore. Where we can strike out on our own power and spirit, setting the rules as we go for better or for worse.
Either way it turns out...whether it'll end up like Star Trek or more like Alien, it's a terribly exciting contemplation.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Visual Viagra
That's this trailer for Indonesian action movie The Raid:
Every frame is like a fucking cluster fragmentation rocket grenade, exploding your eyes full of red-hot razor-sharp ACTION. This trailer gives guns ERECTIONS.
And I think it's about time we had a ball-busting, hole-fucking, rip-roaring hip-shooting old-fucking-school action movie to teach the current crop how it's done. Hint: REAL STUNTS.
SECOND HINT: GUN BONERS.
Every frame is like a fucking cluster fragmentation rocket grenade, exploding your eyes full of red-hot razor-sharp ACTION. This trailer gives guns ERECTIONS.
And I think it's about time we had a ball-busting, hole-fucking, rip-roaring hip-shooting old-fucking-school action movie to teach the current crop how it's done. Hint: REAL STUNTS.
SECOND HINT: GUN BONERS.
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